#sexual #assault #harassment
I was teaching English as a second language full time. As I was bending over to get my notes, a student ( about 45 or so ) said she couldn’t resist the target. She pretended to slap my butt but stopped short by a fraction of an inch. The other ladies seemed uncomfortable as they smiled and looked down. They seemed to be beneath her in the company hierarchy. After class, she came into my personal space and groped me for 2 seconds. She then told me she’d see me next week. The following week nothing happened. Nothing happened for the rest of the 10 weeks. Instead of feeling relieved, I felt nervous before each class. The more nothing happened the more afraid I became. I felt as though I needed to be prepared to be on guard. At the same time, I felt inadequate or like I did something wrong because I was being ignored right after I was her centre of attention.
I was 25 and been sexually harassed. Abused? Used? Assaulted? The end result was a phone call 2 weeks after class. She had gotten my number from the school. The school gave her the number because she said she wanted to personally congratulate me for a great class. Or so she said. I never asked the school. I would sound and look like an idiot. I agreed to meet. There was a sort of cleansing in doing this. She seemed to be a serial rapist. I knew she’d done this before. And no one would dare say anything. We met a few times after this until there was a mutual understanding that she had adequately used me as she wanted to and that I would be scarred somehow.
Truth is that Ilearned that day what being abused sexually was like. In the last meeting, when she hugged me and told me “have a good life, darling ” I realized how this was the end and she had won. Again.